romance

I have tried many men.

Let them give me their pain.

Done beer, done coke, done benz.

And between our chests, wet thighs, open legs,

I have wondered if you ever saw my eyes

or even knew I had a spleen inside.

I do.

But me, in my own special way,

I keep a secret.

You who have spent the night inside did not see my psychosis.

Shredded dreams, grand phantoms,

hole in the chest cavity, naked.

And I will get high, do kink for favours.

I will drink big and smoke and fake it,

but beneath my hard hands lie one hundred tethered cracks.

Memories of the time I drank a case of wine,

slid into the pool to end my life.

Neighbour pulled me out alive.

Aren't you going to give me a proper goodbye?

My cunt is treason.

I am damaged skin.

I am worthless beyond reason.